Things have been a lot of stressful for me since September to the point that I'm starting to wonder when it'd really HIT me big time. Probably that minute I realize what would be missing after I wake up from surgery this month and for months and months, according to people who had experienced this, and psychologists (including my own).
And I have to admit, it is harder for me to talk about anything without thinking, "I tried to be positive, and I'm frankly tired of being strong." People tell me, "you'll feel better!" "You'll be happy when you don't have to deal with your periods anymore!" "It's not the end of the world! Smile!" or worse of all, "You can adopt!"
I did think about addressing this on this blog, and then decided against it. Why? Just my decision. when I can, I will write about whateverso in this blog, and when I feel flunky or sad, pissed or confused, determined or 'you-screw-me, I-screw-you", I'll do that on the other blog that I'm working. So far I had written a surprising numbers of posts, which are still in draft, since I decided I will not publish them all right away- one post per week is sufficent, especially with me writing and then determining how/what to put in the post then. Beside I'd need one post up when I'm gone away in the hospital for a week, anyway.
That reminds me, I need to change my password for this blog(s) since it's old. I don't want tweaking while I'm not around.
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