Monday, December 06, 2010

Ah, Midsummer Night's Dream....Jules' spirit enmeshed.

That Shakespeare play has always been my favorite of all his plays....

Bottom: "Let me play the lion too: I will roar, that I will
do any man's heart good to hear me; I will roar,
that I will make the duke say 'Let him roar again,
let him roar again.'



Fairy: Either I mistake your shape and making quite,
Or else you are that shrewd and knavish sprite
Call'd Robin Goodfellow: are not you he
That frights the maidens of the villagery;
Skim milk, and sometimes labour in the quern
And bootless make the breathless housewife churn;
And sometime make the drink to bear no barm;
Mislead night-wanderers, laughing at their harm?
Those that Hobgoblin call you and sweet Puck,
You do their work, and they shall have good luck:
Are not you he?

Helena: Wherefore was I to this keen mockery born?
When at your hands did I deserve this scorn?
Is't not enough, is't not enough, young man,
That I did never, no, nor never can,
Deserve a sweet look from Demetrius' eye,
But you must flout my insufficiency?
Good troth, you do me wrong, good sooth, you do,
In such disdainful manner me to woo.
But fare you well: perforce I must confess
I thought you lord of more true gentleness.
O, that a lady, of one man refused.
Should of another therefore be abused!




Puck: I'll follow you, I'll lead you about a round,
Through bog, through bush, through brake, through brier:
Sometime a horse I'll be, sometime a hound,
A hog, a headless bear, sometime a fire;
And neigh, and bark, and grunt, and roar, and burn,
Like horse, hound, hog, bear, fire, at every turn.

Titania: My Oberon! what visions have I seen!
Methought I was enamour'd of an ass.






Theseus: More strange than true: I never may believe
These antique fables, nor these fairy toys.
Lovers and madmen have such seething brains,
Such shaping fantasies, that apprehend
More than cool reason ever comprehends.
The lunatic, the lover and the poet
Are of imagination all compact:
One sees more devils than vast hell can hold,
That is, the madman: the lover, all as frantic,
Sees Helen's beauty in a brow of Egypt:
The poet's eye, in fine frenzy rolling,
Doth glance from heaven to earth, from earth to heaven;
And as imagination bodies forth
The forms of things unknown, the poet's pen
Turns them to shapes and gives to airy nothing
A local habitation and a name.
Such tricks hath strong imagination,
That if it would but apprehend some joy,
It comprehends some bringer of that joy;
Or in the night, imagining some fear,
How easy is a bush supposed a bear!



Pyramus: "O grim-look'd night! O night with hue so black!
O night, which ever art when day is not!
O night, O night! alack, alack, alack,
I fear my Thisby's promise is forgot!
And thou, O wall, O sweet, O lovely wall,
That stand'st between her father's ground and mine!
Thou wall, O wall, O sweet and lovely wall,
Show me thy chink, to blink through with mine eyne!


and my favorite quotes from the play itself...



Puck: If we shadows have offended,
Think but this, and all is mended,
That you have but slumber'd here
While these visions did appear.
And this weak and idle theme,
No more yielding but a dream,
Gentles, do not reprehend:
if you pardon, we will mend:
And, as I am an honest Puck,
If we have unearned luck
Now to 'scape the serpent's tongue,
We will make amends ere long;
Else the Puck a liar call;
So, good night unto you all.
Give me your hands, if we be friends,
And Robin shall restore amends.






Bless his heart, that Shakespeare had seen into the Otherworld and attempted to show us the world...and methinks..he did it well. Bravo, the poet of comedy and love, the writer of drama and sorrow, the sorcerer of grace and magick, Shakespeare!

Beef and pork recipes tried and loved!


Sloppy Joe Nachos
1 pound ground beef
1 can (15 ½ oz) sloppy joe sauce
1 package (12 oz) tortilla chips
¾ cup shredded cheddar cheese
In a large skillet, cook beef over medium heat until no longer pink; drain. Add sloppy joe sauce; cook, uncovered for 5 minutes or until heated through.
Arrange tortilla chips on a serving plate. Top with meat mixture and cheese. 6 servings.



Beef-Stuffed Zucchini
4 medium zucchini
1 pound ground beef
½ cup chopped onion
1 egg
¾ cup marinara or spaghetti sauce
¼ cup seasoned bread crumbs
¼ teaspoon salt
¼ teaspoon pepper
1 cup (4 oz) shredded Monterey jack cheese, divided
Additional marinara or spaghetti sauce
Cut zucchini in half lengthwise; cut a thin slice from the bottom of each with the sharp knife to allow zucchini to sit flat. Scoop out pulp, leaving ¼ inch shell
Place shells in an ungreased 13x9x2 microwave-safe dish. Turn off microwave turntable setting. Cover and microwave on high for 3 minutes or until crisp-tender; drain and set aside.
Meanwhile, in a large skillet, cook beef and onion over medium heat until meat is no longer pink; drain. Remove from the heat; stir in the egg, marinara sauce, bread crumbs, salt, pepper and ½ cup cheese.
Spoon about ¼ cup into each shell. Microwave, uncovered, on high for 4 minutes. Sprinkle with remaining cheese. Microwave 3-4 minutes longer or zucchinis are tender. Serve with additional marinara sauce. 4 servings.



Apple Juice Pork with Squash and Golden Raisins
4 1-inch-thick boneless pork loin chops
Salt and pepper
3 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
1 onion, coarsely chopped
1 cup apple juice
½ butternut squash –peeled, seeded and cut into 1-inch pieces
½ cup golden raisins
3 tablespoons chopped fresh sage
Preheat the oven to 250 degrees. Season the pork chops with salt and pepper. In a large, heavy skillet, heat 1 tablespoon olive oil over medium-high heat. Working in 2 batches, add the pork chops and 1 more tablespoon oil between batches. Cook until browned, about 5 minutes on each side. Transfer to an overproof dish and tent with foil; place in the oven.
Add the remaining 1 tablespoon oil to the skillet over medium-high heat. Add the onion and cook for 2 minutes, scraping up any browned bits. Stir in the apple juice, squash, raisins and sage; season with salt and pepper. Cover and cook until the squash is tender, about 10 minutes. Using a slotted spoon, transfer the squash mixture to a bowl. Cook the remaining liquid until syrupy, about 5 minutes. Serve the pork with the squash and pan sauce.



Pumpkin and Sausage Penne
¾ cup uncooked penne pasta
2 Italian sausage links, casings removed
½ cup chopped sweet onion
1 garlic clove, minced
1 teaspoon olive oil
1/3 cup white wine or chicken broth
1 bay leaf
¾ cup chicken broth
1/3 cup canned pumpkin
3 teaspoons minced fresh sage, divided
1/8 teaspoon ground cinnamon
Dash ground nutmeg
3 tablespoons half-and-half cream
1/8 teaspoon salt
1/8 teaspoon pepper
2 tablespoons shredded Romano cheese
Cook pasta according to package instructions. Meanwhile, in a large skillet, cook sausage over medium heat until no longer pink. Using a slotted spoon, remove to paper towels; drain, reserving 1 teaspoon drippings.
In same skillet, sauté onion and garlic in oil and reserved drippings until tender. Add wine and bay leaf. Bring to a boil; cook until liquid is reduced by half. Stir in the broth, pumpkin, 1 ½ teaspoon sage, cinnamon and nutmeg; cook 1 minute longer.
Add the sausage, cream, salt and pepper; heat thoroughly. Drain pasta; place in a serving bowl. Add the mixture; toss to coat. Sprinkle with cheese and remaining sage.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Fluctuating Days of October


How much I love the month of October; the beauty of red, orange and yellow coloring the world, the crispy taste of cold mornings, the leaf-dancing breezes, the chilling joy of Samhain (Halloween to y'all non pagans) and the mystery of night ever alive in this Hunter's Moon. Opportunties to taste pumpkin pie, hot chocolate, pork and squash; to gut a pumpkin and see the face light up in night; and to walk among the leaves and music of the trees preparing to sleep.



Yet..I hate October. Of all months, October is tough to me. A discovery of a murdered woman among the fallen leaves; most forgotten by everyone except for her family and I, although the name is starting to fade from memory. A relative's death by suicide; common in my family, it seems, just like leaves falling one by one. A car hitting me, leaving me with my own struggle, one foot in the summerlands and one foot in the world here, and not knowing if I would survive, but to survive paralyzed or whole. Masks discharged, revealing true or false friendships in the true environment of the hospital. Power struggles during the vulnerable moment of the hour.

I'm reminded gently by the Goddess, that October is of balance. Dark and Light. Whispers in the silent darkness, foretelling new beginnings. Mystery of Life and Death. Samhain is a time of introspection, of emptying the false from the mind, heart, and soul. Dawn and Twilight. Two sides of the coin. Cannot have one without the other. The only choice I have is how I live walking the path of the labyrinth, among the fallen fire-colored leaves.

Wednesday, September 22, 2010

Yoga and Christianity, they don't mix?

I was quite flabbergasted after I read the article “Yoga can be dangerous to Christians’ faith” says Louisville’s Southern Baptist Seminary President Albert Mohler, on his blog, http://www.albertmohler.com/2010/09/20/the-subtle-body-should-christians-practice-yoga/ I want to respectfully discuss his concern about Yoga and its ‘effects’ on Christianity.

“ Syman describes yoga as a varied practice, but she makes clear that yoga cannot be fully extricated from its spiritual roots in Hinduism and Buddhism. She is also straightforward in explaining the role of sexual energy in virtually all forms of yoga and of ritualized sex in some yoga traditions” Mohler was quoted in his blog. He then stressed on how he was concerned about how yoga practices include physical and spiritual exercises, in the goal to connect with the Divine as well as wellness. He responded, “Believers are called to meditate upon the Word of God — an external Word that comes to us by divine revelation — not to meditate by means of incomprehensible syllables.”

Now I have to wonder about that….. After all… praying, meditation and connecting with the Divine can be richly varied in Christianity as well as Buddhism, Islam, Hindu, Paganism, and other religions that could fill up more pages than I could, but you get my meaning. Shall we see what I mean by that?

In process of praying-meditation…. Candles are used in yoga to help focus and become aware of the divine, and so do many religions.


Woman lighting candles at a church in Tbilis, Georgia


Jewish woman says the blessing upon lighting the sabbath candles (2)


A Muslim woman lights a candle at a shrine dedicated to the prophet Elijah (3)

Praying to get closer to the Divine, as Yoga encourages becoming aware of Divine in both physical and spiritual.


Kenyans praying (4)


Christian woman praying (5)


Muslim man praying (6)


A Kneeling Hindu Balinese Woman Prays and Gives Offerings at Sunset (7)


Pagan praying (8)



Meditating on problems/concerns. Yoga does that, to help clear the mind and process the problem… and we seek answers from the Divine, as well, don't we?


Christian meditating (9)


Woman of Sikh (10)

Tools that contribute to meditation/praying…..


Walking the Labyrinth in Chartres Cathedral (11)


Woman meditating- origins of labyrinths come out with 4000 years, from lands such as Egyptian, Indian, Native American, Greek and Northern Europe. (12)


Rosary beads in a Catholic Christian‘s hands- in which types of beads are used by Christians and Muslims (13)


A monk holds prayer beads in McLeod Ganj, India. (14)


Prayers Stones (15)







Scents to help us think of the Divine, as well as at yoga- after all, didn’t Jesus receive frankincense as a gift for one example?


Incense- which can be found in churches, as well as in temples and locations of prayers and residences. (16)


Praying to the Buddha (17)







We can’t go without music in prayer…and yoga


Harp music in church (18)


Signing with Deaf and Deaf/Blind in both preaching and singing in silence (19)


Drumming with shamans (20)


Choir of Southern Baptist Church Praise and Worship Center (21)

Now…. With all that we had seen, how can yoga NOT be a tool for Christians to get closer to the Divine? Meditation can be so different for each of us, but we share the common goal- to get intimate with the Divine in many names that we follow. We also can use meditation for mindfulness, wellness, holistic health and exercise.

After all, I confess to meditating while vaccuming and I do consider feeling closer to Her after the house is clean.





Resources


(1) http://kevinkoski.com/Hobbies%20and%20Interests/Bicycle%20Touring/rtw/photos.html

(2) http://religion.info/english/articles/article_470.shtml
(3) http://www.daylife.com/photo/0eoWf779ETeJg

(4) http://www.thedisplacedafrican.com/2008/01/steps-to-end-the-suffering-and-violence-in-kenya/
(5) www.joyfullyliving.blogspot.com
(6) http://islamiclearningmaterials.com/islam-prayer/
(7) http://www.digitalhit.com/posters/p/4901480
(8) http://witchywonderland.blogspot.com/2010/05/pagan-prayer.html
(9) http://www.spiritrax.com/subcategory.php?id=13
(10) http://www.sikhnet.com/news/naam-japo-meditation-prayer-and-its-purpose
(11) http://yourworldreligions.blogspot.com/2007/06/prayer-of-heart-christian-meditation.html
(12) http://naradashaktisolutions.wordpress.com/2010/05/19/labyrinths-the-upside-of-walking-around-in-circles/
(13) http://www.freshmeditation.com/blog/easy-step-meditation/rosary-meditation/
(14) http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/destinations/asia/india/739176/India-holy-cows-and-fine-shrines.html
(15) http://prayerfullife.com/2010/05/principle4/
(16) http://stjev.org/prayer-and-a-pint
(17) http://www.thaiworldview.com/bouddha/ceremo15.htm
(18) http://transfigurations.blogspot.com/2007_10_01_archive.html
(19) http://www.chron.com/disp/story.mpl/chronicle/6406132.html
(20) http://www.dreamingshaman.com/ongoing_events.htm
(21) http://www.1800gospel.com/2008/10/gospel-music-news-how-sweet-the-sound/

Monday, September 20, 2010

Mirror, Mirror, who are you?


Throughout childhood to young adulthood, I had to struggle with self blame and self loathe. Any success I experienced, I doubt that it was really me; it was because the teacher, the judge, the group felt sorry for me. I tended to stay to the wall, to stay invisible and to avoid eye contact- why? To survive.
No matter how many A's I could get through schools, no matter how much recognition through fund-raisers and awareness of causes I raised, no matter how often I could meet the expectations, even beyond the unrealistic expectations, I was always considered a failure. I BELIEVED I was a failure.
It was through the fourth therapist, I was asked, "WHO are you, really?" No one had really asked me that before. I couldn't answer that. No, I was TERRIFIED to find out the truth.
I looked at the face in the mirror and wondered, "who is she?" I didn't want to say "me" because after all if I dared to say "me" or "I", I'd end up skinned raw by the scalding venom of her. It was always her, ALWAYS her, it's her clothes, her style, her opinions, her perspectives, her personality, HER. No such as Julie- it was just a clone of HER. To dare thinking different, I felt I was betraying her.
It took me a long time, almost twenty years before I realized- I didn't know who I was, if anyone asked me, I mimicked HER views, never mine since I didn't have any opinions. I then knew that to save any part of myself, I had to escape. I did so, putting a thousand and more miles between us. I felt like a newborn baby- scared witless in the new world; I wanted so badly to return back to her.
I forced myself to stay where I was. I explored with baby steps, such as going to a department store by myself and picking out a pair of sneakers was a tremendous step for me at age of 26! I had to sample a variety of food before I would realize that I like BBQ ribs so much and I dislike busset sprouts- at age of 27. How little people could imagine on how personality can develop from tasting food and trying on clothes in the beginning!
With more learning I gathered, more I realized how much I had missed; I didn't get to jump on the bed, I didn't play dress-up; I didn't have the chance to climb a tree. I never had a healthy childhood. I had to take care of her; to make her happy, I had to predict her moods and take care of her needs even before she thought of them. I ignored my own needs to take care of her need for attention and demands. Due to trying to please her, I was a people pleaser. I could not say no to anything, even to unreasonable queries. I would offer to do errands for people out of my way, just to get them to like me. I experienced a burn out, and I realized as I recovered.. No one was there for me It was a cruel awakening! At encouragement, I read "How to say no without feeling guilty" and walk the walk. I practiced saying "no" and not to experience "did I just SCREW myself up? They are angry at me! Have to do it to keep everything fine!" The world didn't end as I thought it would.
I started to be very angry, I felt she OWES me for so many things I had missed out, about thinking about herself, not me, even at age of six, ten and sixteen. I became bitter. I started to tear into people, pouring venom on people, and manipulating them; finding their weaknesses and using to get them to do what I wanted them to. A friend went, "Why are you becoming like her??!" That rattled my soul! I didn't want to be her, I wanted to be ME.
It took another ten years before I discovered myself, ironically after the hit and run where I had to learn to feed myself, to dress myself, to sit down on the toilet and to write again. I started to see the child within me, and I realized I did not want to lose her again.
After years of re-discovery, challenges, pushing beyond my own limits and dangers, I know who I am, and you know what....I like who I am, and I am not like her at all. I find joy in seeing simple things, giving of love without expecting something back, laughing and crying without worrying about being caught, and being myself. I like wolves. I love to walk labyrinths. I enjoy reading comic books. I prefer baggy jeans and sandals, barefoot if I can! I find joy in radical feminism and being outspoken about HIV/AIDS education for Deaf. I let tears fall due to natural disasters and New Orleans without being ashamed. I am me.
And her? She is my mother, I love her, but I do not have to be like her, I do not owe her anything. I AM WHO I AM.

Thursday, July 01, 2010

Canvas Labyrinth

I had applied for a mini-grant in a goal to get a canvas labyrinth. Why a canvas labyrinth? It is mobile. I can take it out and unwrap it to have it available for clients or staff. I can bring it to workshops and presentations at conferences to show the benefits of using labyrinths for both therapeutic usage and de-stressing. When it is not needed, I can fold it and put it in a bin to put away 'til it's needed. I don't have to worry about finances in building a permanent labyrinth, or of figuring where to set up a temporary labyrinth. Don't get me wrong- I enjoyed doing that chalk labyrinth! It is just that they can't expect me to up and make one when someone needs it! The cement'd need to be cleaned, ropes and measurement tapes'd be needed to set up, and hour of back-bending labor- it can be exhausting!
Now I had found out that I had been approved to get a canvas labyrinth- so I'm SO thrilled, beyond imagination!!! It is like it is destiny of mine to introduce the labyrinth's poetic beauty and serene environment. I'm so excited to order the labyrinth! This is what I plan to order from The Labyrinth Company.



I'll do a labyrinth presentation at SERID this fall, as well as at the Deafestival in Kentucky. ::dancing around:::

Friday, June 04, 2010

Chalk labyrinth at where I work!

It had rained last night and the cement was damp at the Behavioral Health playground. That did not stop Jeremy K. and me from creating the chalk labyrinth we had planned for 3 weeks. The goal of making the labyrinth was to provide a therapeutic tool for the clients to explore to see whether it would benefit them. Staff and co-workers weren’t forgotten- they can use the labyrinth as well, for relaxation/de-stressing.


What is the word, “labyrinth?” According to the dictionary, labyrinths are places constructed with intricate passageways. The obvious difference between labyrinths and mazes is that mazes have dead ends and confusing passages, while one enters the labyrinth in one entrance and leave in the very same doorway. By walking the maze, one might experience confusion, frustration and anxiety, trouble trusting the surroundings, and the ultimate goal is to “Get out of this environment.” With the labyrinth, it is a safe environment, awakening the right side of the brain which leads to self exploration, finding the quiet in the mind, problem-solving and at least but important, meditation and relaxation skills.

Labyrinths had been used for children with ADHD, grief/loss groups, survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault, corporate teams for brainstorming, college students before final exams, recovering addicts from substance abuse, families with someone in the hospice/nursing homes, and individuals struggling with terminal diseases.


Labyrinths can be created with anything. Ropes, painting, grass, wildflowers, bricks, stones and spotlights have been used. Labyrinths can be permanent (stones or grass), or can be temporary (spotlights and chalk). One can even have a mobile labyrinth by using a canvas and bring it to workshops, clients at other locations when it is not possible for the clients to come to a permanent location. With all this knowledge I have, I decided that we will create a labyrinth at work. Using chalk to create the labyrinth is decided due to reasons: a) temporary on the basketball court, b) can be washed away by rain and c) cheaper to do than using other kind of materials.

We started with measuring the starting points, then starting with a rope in making circles for the labyrinth with the chalk. Upon completion of lines, we filled in with thicker chalk marks, to make it easier for people to walk the path. Having the variety of chalk makes it more fun for us as well! The creation of the labyrinth was bigger than we expected. I first estimated it to take 3-4 hours to complete, but with Jeremy working with me, we completed it in an hour and half!


I introduced some clients to the labyrinth during the week. One client who was struggling with domestic violence walked the labyrinth, and held a rock saying “love”. She hoped for an answer to whether her husband can learn to love her. After the walk, she said, “when walking, I was thinking about the abuse; I got to the center (of the labyrinth), I realized something: I need to learn to love myself; without that, how can I learn to love healthily?” A client with impulsive/anger issues had thought walking the labyrinth “silly” when he saw it, but chose to walk it to “see how it’d work.” While he was walking, I observed he was walking fast toward the center, and then he started to slow down. When he started to walk back- he walked much slower, very much like an older man. He was not ready to talk about the walk. He agreed to think about what he had experienced and see me next week. I saw him yesterday; he displayed a clear-eyed calmness and he was ready to talk. He said he could not help but recalls obstacles he experienced through his hard life, and turning corners on the labyrinth reminded him of those. When thinking he was about to get close to the center, he found himself on the longer path instead. He then realized, “When I look for short-cuts, I fall into holes. I have to take the long way, to learn and help myself.”
I’m not saying that the labyrinths are a cure-all, or that it is good for everyone. It won’t work with people with severe psychosis or major depression. What is the purpose of a labyrinth, then? A meditative tool. A safe place to pray and to ‘slow down.’ A physical walk to slow the over-thinking and increase listening mindfully. A client-therapist connection; the therapist to be the guardian at the gate where the client walks in and explore herself. A path that leads you to where you subconsciously need to be at that time, peace within yourself and perhaps something that you are ready to hear or not.

Sandtray and labyrinths

I like to say that labyrinths can be created with anything.
On the other hand, sand tray is a wonderful therapuetic tool to express one's story without verbalizing anything.
This is an example

decorated with a variety of stuff- marbles, glass, hearts, shamrocks, rocks, etc.








and there's another one...more simpler

This world is screwed when it comes to religion and sex.

"Priest molested 200 boys in Wisconsin" "Irish Priest was not charged for molestions reported by victims" "Church apologizes but not take action in preventing future molestions." So many articles throughout the recent years.
Mind you, I am not writing to attack the church. I am questioning on how this could happen.

Let's look at the education system. Despite the criminal records, referrals, background checks and policies set up to protect students, there are teachers still arrested for inappropriate touching, sextexting, having sex with students. The latest report is of a middle school teacher arrested for molesting a student in a closet, according to this article on June 2, 2010: http://www.nj.com/news/index.ssf/2010/06/former_denville_teacher_admits.html.

Now, let's eye the Correctional system. We all know that there is a rate of criminals in jails: rapists, child molestors, guys who take pictures of naked children in sexual poses and sell pictures, or in the worst case, children. What is disturbing is that police has to ensure that there is no loophole for the lawyers defending the predators to avoid going to jail. Even if they end up in the jail for, let's say, 20-25 years, so many could get out with "good behavior" or agreeing to be monitored with an electronic ankle bracelet tracking his movements. (And I do wonder, how much are monitors paid for doing that?) Sex Offender Registration with cities\counties\state is good, but that still is a question mark on whether it really works. After all, recall Chelsea of California, recently, who was killed by a registered sex offender. (http://www.livesecure.org/san-diego-teen-chelsea-king-murdered-registered-sex-offender-held-for-her-death-update/)

And unfortunately, we see too many monsters that hadn't been in jail or even in psychiatric hospitals, like that Garrido who had kidnapped a young girl and kept her as a sex slave over fifteen years, who gave birth to two daughters (and forbid the thought on whether THEY experienced sex abuse too). And not even police could get away with "protect and serve;" after all a Scarmento Sheriff's deputy was recently arrested for kidnapping and molesting a 13 years old girl, on March 2, 2010. (http://auburnjournal.com/detail/143638.html)

Not even Europe or other counties are spared. Too many girls, women and babies are raped in some areas of Africa, being the claim that taking a virgin is a cure for HIV\AIDS. Let's not forget the Austrian father, Fritzl had hidden his own daughter in a basement and fathering several children on her for 24 years.

We TRY to keep track of sex offenders; we take action to make sure, at LEAST to prevent molestors from doing it again, although it is not fool-proof. Education and prevention is especially important in protecting children and adults alike- not even seniors are spared the terror of rape and sexual abuse. An excellent example: a parent or two reports to a school about a PE teacher touching male students under 13 years old, and taking them out in his car, the school and\or parents takes action and report to the police who then comes arresting the teacher and taking him\her to court (jail is potential, among with fines, losing teaching licensure, put on probation and sex offender registration.) THEN the school and parents work on getting crisis counseling for students, providing psycho-educational workshops for fellow parents and teaching kids how to protect themselves. Furthermore, the school strengthens their policies and procedures to ensure that it won't happen; being more strict with background checks, monitoring teachers and students, and systematically review teachers and staff that work at schools (bus-drivers, nurses, principals, janitors, etc). The city where the school is based in, then reviews their own laws and see how they'd reduce the risks for potential harm in the future; perhaps increasing decrees for molestors such as jail for life, death penalty (Louisiana wanted to do that) or banning absolutely from all schools. The bottom line is: the school and city TAKES *responsibility* of ensuring the children's safety and PUT on themselves the responsibility to prevent potential harm of children.

Now, what does it have to do with the Church and the molesting priests? Nothing, really. Well, but for one thing. A powerful religious organization tries to sweep it under the rug, and refuse to deflock priests that have a history of molestion but for very FEW individuals?. Do you know that only 3% get deflocked? The church apologizes, ask us to pray and forgive them, and hope that it'd not happen again. Very, very few takes action in preventation. That's the difference.
As according to this article, they are getting away, so far. (http://abovethelaw.com/2010/05/u-s-government-weighs-in-on-vatican-sex-abuse-siding-with-the-vatican/)

Monday, March 22, 2010

Animals using the labyrinth, what has come to the world?

Walking the labyrinth is a wonderful tool for a variety of purposes; healing, letting go, de-stressing, forgiving, meditating, creating and transforming, and discovering the relationship between humanity and the universe. Throughout years I had walked many labyrinths, either by myself or with groups at many locations. District of Columbia, Colorado, California, Hawaii, Great Britain, Maryland, Canada, and Utah are a few examples. However, I never had walked the labyrinth with animals before.

What could one mean by walking the labyrinth with animals? Good question. I had not even heard about it until I started reading “The Way of Labyrinth: A Powerful Meditation for Everyday Life” by Helen Curry. This statement caught my attention,


Horses have been observed walking a labyrinth on their own when one is left in the field.”

That intrigued me. Could labyrinths be used by animals? I know that there is not much differences between us and animals, and that I feel what may be of good to us may be beneficial for the animals. I did more search for labyrinths and animals, and I found this newsletter printed by ‘The Spirit of Veriditas: Voices from the Labyrinth’, Spring 2009, focusing on animals and labyrinths.

The Founder of Veriditas, Lauren Artress reported being told by a women group in New Jersey of an experience with a deer. What happened is that they had a priest telling a myth of Diana (Roman Goddess of the hunt and wildlife) When they were preparing to create a labyrinth, they heard unusual noise in another area of the church. They went investigating and lo! They found a scared deer, that had wandered into the church and then walked across the wet painting of the labyrinth, leaving behind hooves printed upon the labyrinth. The women encouraged the deer to leave, and they decided to leave the footprints alone, to remind themselves, “things come to what we focus upon.”

There are articles about dogs and cats using the labyrinth, as well as photos of dogs, horses and birds walking the labyrinths.


Jonathan Rudinger, founder of Permassage training for canine bodywork, located in Ohio, observed as he encouraged owners to walk the labyrinths with their dogs,

“This labyrinth is very different. It celebrates two entities and two parts of our personality just like the two drops of water merging. Walking this pattern is about working together as one partnership.”

I wanted to experience that firsthand. Lola, the almost 1 years old Peke-pom mix was my first choice, since she is hyper. I figured it would be good for her to learn how to slow down with me. I took her to the labyrinth at Louisville Presbyterian Seminary today. She was very restless at the start of the labyrinth, that I picked her up and carried her all through the labyrinth- she was tense at the beginning. I observed that I felt she was heavy, and I realized- I’m learning a lesson myself…I had seen her as a burden, to clean up after and to discipline. I had lost the sight of what Lola was meant to be, a puppy, and that she is young; that it is not her ‘job’ to mess up my life. I chose to see it that way, and I acknowledged my wrong. As I carried her, I smelled her fur, hugged her and observed what she observed in my arms, the squirrel looking for nuts, a robin under the bushes and the swaying daffodils nearby. At the center, she was relaxed and I felt more lightened in spirit.


I chose to see her as a dog to be loved and eager to learn, not a human being in fur to scold or teach properly. She is a ripple in my life and that is what we need of each other; to love and accept.

She was ready to walk the labyrinth with me, and after a few encouragements and pets, she walked the labyrinth for the first time- she walked close and slowed down. At every corner to be turned, I’d bend down and scratch her head, “good girl!” It was cool to see Lola explore the labyrinth, the new spring flowers, the moss growing over the bricks; and to see the grace of us both walking the labyrinth.

Lola walked the path and I look forward to walk the labyrinth often with her!

Monday, November 09, 2009

Unleashing the Labyrinth


Disney World. Why would I bring up Disney World, writing about my experiences with the labyrinth? Have you ever read Mark Twain’s book about Tom Sawyer, where he and his sweetheart got lost looking for an exit out of the caves that felt like a maze? Disney World had those types of caves on the Finn Huck Island beside the steamboat and the log roller coaster. I remember when I was twelve, I was darting through those caves with dimmed lights. At a dare by a friend, I entered the dark cave (with no lights), so I had to feel walls of the stony tunnel, hoping to find a way out. Out of the dark, someone grabbed and scratched at my ankle; in panic, I ran and bam! Slammed my face onto the cave wall. Someone used a cigarette lighter to see what was going on. In the distance I saw the exit and ran out. I remember looking down at my ankle and found it bleeding from scratches. A friend’s parent saw me, waving at me, smiling but the smile disappeared. She came quicker and took out a tissue to wipe at my nose; it turned out I had a nosebleed from slamming my face. I remember thinking that the ugly hands grabbed at me in the dark and because of that, I could not trust the darkness anymore after that experience. That included the darkness within me.


Now, it has been many years since when I was lost in the caves. I am a practicing shaman for almost twelve years. I have also been working and studying human services/mental health counseling. As a studying shaman, I feel more closer to two counseling theories, which is Existential (in which focuses on freedom of choice, responsibility, awareness of death, connection, finding meaning in life, and living experience) and Mind-body counseling (becoming aware of our own body’s messages, connecting our spirit/emotions/bodies), which can be applied to many aspects of shamanism in which is attunement of body, spirit and mind, which then is connected to nature. I found myself attracted to walking labyrinths for years without understanding my fascination. I remember my excitement when I would find several labyrinths in and out of London, as well as in Colorado, California, Maryland, New York, Hawaii, Pennsylvania and Utah. It helped that some wise elders encouraged me to look into using labyrinths as self-care and a de-stressor. Ironically, I found that walking the labyrinth is a walking meditation! When I would try to meditate in one place, I couldn’t do it. I discovered that when I walked labyrinths, I could go inside myself; and discover hidden aspects of me through exploring the fears and learn how to work with myself.


I went to Gallaudet University for an interview with Dr. Jeffrey Lewis for graduate school the week of homecoming 2005. The night after, I was a victim of a hit & run in Washington, DC. I had been left behind with two broken legs, torn leg tendons, a broken neck vertebra and a torn neck artery. While in the hospital for weeks, I had experienced a vivid dream while sleeping. In that dream, I was walking a labyrinth made of glowing bricks on the streets of Duport Circle, and more I walked, I was escorted by someone unseen with gentle touches upon my arms. Once I got to the center, I looked down and realized I was in space, looking down at Earth. The planet was beautiful. I got the feeling that it was time for me to return, and I did so- I woke up much re-energized. The doctors were surprised when I learned to walk again in March, when they felt I would walk again by summer (though with wheelchair, motorized scooter, the crutches and then cane.)


Despite doctors’ asking me to slow down, I returned to school full-time. I was more determined to finish the last year of undergraduate school and go on to graduate school. Now, if you don’t know what the Denver campus look like, let me explain- we have three campuses in one area- Community College of Denver, Metropolitan State College of Denver and the University of Colorado in Denver. It is quite a huge campus for an able person, even more for one relying on a wheelchair, crutches or cane! Being deaf was challenging, even with having interpreters and access to education. With leg injuries, I became invisible. It was like everyone went ‘blind’ pretending that they didn’t see me as I struggled in my wheelchair uphill to a class or fought to open a door while using the crutches. I was at eye-level with people relying on wheelchairs or crutches (CP, paralysis, or other physical disabilities) and it greatly humbled me; I was honored to learn their world, and I discovered they are more human than able people, with such compassion and understanding. With that knowledge, I was fervently determined to ensure that people, who have right to education, to communication, and to being treated as human beings, are HEARD. I learned from the school of tough knocks and from academics, and I did finish with a B.S degree in Human Services, concentrating in mental health.


I had gotten accepted into the mental health counseling graduate program at Gallaudet University in the fall of 2007, and I was excited! I felt a passion within my heart to continue my studies in mental health, but I still had questions: How can I include labyrinths in therapy? Is it possible to use labyrinths as a therapy technique? Can Deaf people consider labyrinths as a viable asset in helping themselves?


In the orientation to mental health course, Ms. Kendra Smith handed out several old American Counseling Association newspapers, encouraging us to take one for each of us. I saw one handout was on Hurricane Katrina and mental health (everyone who knows me, know I have a great interest in natural disasters and effects on mental health), so I chose that. That night, I opened it to read, and on the sixth page, I was astonished to find an article on using labyrinths as an alternative counseling technique. That finally answered my questions on whether labyrinths can be used in counseling! This discovery encouraged me to pursue the inspiration of using the labyrinth as an alternative technique. To add, my professors encouraged me profoundly to consider using the labyrinth as a tool in counseling once they found out about my interest.



I knew how to use the labyrinth, since I have done labyrinth walks for years but I wasn’t sure how to use it FOR OTHERS. I decided to look into whether there are trainings or workshops. I found that Veriditas, the Worldwide Labyrinth Project, provides trainings, which are called Labyrinth Facilitating. You could not imagine my excitement! I contacted the staff at the project to find out that the trainings were very expensive, nothing to cough at! I was discouraged since I knew I couldn’t afford the training. I talked with Dr. Jeffrey Lewis, the director for the mental health counseling graduate program, and he persuaded me to take the training since there was a grant that can help finance the training. After all, it would enrich my learning and benefit the Deaf community in the long run. After dealing with several obstacles for almost a year and attending internship in KY, I finally got accepted for Labyrinth facilitating training in Boulder, Colorado back in March, 2009. Only one last obstacle was finding interpreters! Due to the organization being a non-profit, they could not afford ASL interpreters, especially with the training located at the church. My VR counselor removed that obstacle, knowing as well as Dr. Lewis, that it will be a valuable tool for me and the Deaf community; we got interpreters arranged for the three-days of intensive training! Nevertheless, it did make me wonder how hard it is for Deaf individuals to get interpreters for non-profit trainings.


The trainings were both reflective and stimulating. The teachers learned from me about the Deaf community, the norms and how to socialize with Deaf community, for either communication or providing labyrinth trainings/presentations. I learned how to use the labyrinth in its variety of textiles (visual and physical) and interacting with people, individually and in groups. I learned that it is very different walking the labyrinth singularly (much focusing on oneself and finding peace within) and in groups (being aware of other people, overlapping the path, and becoming aware of the world within ourselves.)


Interpreters and I taught the teachers and fellow students, indirectly as the students discovered even if I may “sign short”, ASL means more, and that takes interpreters longer to talk (imagine me signing, and then waiting for the interpreter to catch up and finish!) It was a challenge to include interpreters in the physical area of the labyrinth training- some interpreters walked the labyrinth in the beginning. In the end after efforts and errors, we all figured when I was walking the labyrinth- the interpreters were to stay silent and stay out of the labyrinth, so I can focus on the activity fully among the fellow students. I became closer with the teacher, Jo Ann Mast, and Lauren Artress, the founder of the Worldwide Labyrinth Project. We brainstormed on how the labyrinth could enhance Deaf people who may be interested, including deaf-blind. We also discussed about using other ways to enrich the experience with colors, candles, drumming and/or crystal toning bowls since I realized I couldn’t hear the harp that was used for one labyrinth walk, or the bells that were shaken at another walk.


I was saddened that I wouldn’t work with the Jo Ann Mast, the Labyrinth teacher anymore, but I also knew she will be there by email if I need- she has a big heart and she showed it all through the trainings! They told me that I was the first deaf person to take the training; I felt both thrilled and overwhelmed by that fact! I was thrilled to know that I have been given the opportunity to be a representative of the Deaf community to the organization. I was scared that I could screw it up for the Deaf community, and that I was biting off more than I could handle!



One thing I learned during the training stuck in my mind and I use it often for many other things; “There is no right or wrong way to use the labyrinth” and I interpreted it personally for myself, “I follow my gut; whatever decisions I make, it’s right for me, even if it leads to a disaster- I learn from it.” That can apply to everyone, using the labyrinth, and in their lives. After the trainings, we received a small gift, which was a coin-sized labyrinth in one could put in the pocket. I touch it often for inner strength and support.


I needed to do three presentations so I can become certified as a Veriditas labyrinth facilitator. I returned to my internship, thinking “I need to introduce the labyrinth to the Deaf community, but where to start?” I swear Dr. Lewis read my mind because after discussing with him about my training, he asked me to give a presentation on using the labyrinth as an alternative technique and self-care to first year mental health graduate students at Gallaudet a few days before my graduation. I was bowled over by the opportunity, to do my first presentation at the Gallaudet where all my interest in labyrinths had grown in leaps during my graduate studies! Sure enough, I gave a PowerPoint on labyrinth walking and working with clients, as well as for students/professionals for self-care and de-stressing. I ended the presentation with the students walking the labyrinth at a church near Chinatown. The students reported enjoying the walk profoundly- finding it both peacefully and thought-provoking. Some were still “thinking” after the activity at lunch, which is not surprising, since labyrinth walks can cause catharsis and thinking for a long while on what is going on in their lives. I encouraged journaling and using the labyrinth for the second year students, especially with them attending graduate school. Some students report to me that they have walked some labyrinths several times after the presentation, and that is exactly what I wanted to hear; the deaf individuals finding the labyrinth a visual meditation and relaxation for themselves, enriching their lives and becoming better counselors for Deaf for when they graduate. Currently, I’m working on finding two more opportunities to provide labyrinth presentations for certification.


Now I’m a mental health therapist in KY, working with deaf and hard-of-hearing community from individual counseling to providing workshops. I keep on introducing the labyrinth to Deaf people much as I can, and my path that had been introduced to me in both trauma and growth, is continuing with passion and determination. I no longer fear the darkness within me, because I learned that for some people like me, labyrinths can lead to the dark and introduce me to hidden strengths and answers that I was not ready back then, but now I welcome. I learned how to use the darkness in me as a line to walk to a spiritual and mental balance within me. I believe that using the labyrinth is walking a line between sound and silence, in which one learn to quiet the noisy thinking and to heed the silence within oneself, to find the potential and the soul ‘s music that had been neglected for a long time.
To conclude , when one is determined to walk his path, even with obstacles, the reward in the long run will be enriching, not in monetary nor in number of friends, but in self-growth and teaching. I could not help but find the irony within us. There is a body piece within us all; there is a labyrinth within us all! It is the labyrinth, one part of our ears- the inner ear, made of hearing and balance components. We could walk the outside labyrinth in meditation with our feet, and we already have inner labyrinths within our ears. We learn how to balance ourselves, juggling the job, the family, the finances and social life, and our ears help keep us balanced. How fitting is the Deaf community walking a variety of paths, yet all comes together of a path of humanity, inside and outside?